Monday, March 23, 2015

Another One Bites the Dust

When I was in my early twenties every time someone got engaged or married, my single friends and I would sing that catchy song "Another one bites the dust" (sing it with me). We would laugh it off as a way of masking our real emotions of feeling left out and knowing that we were no longer the priority in our friends life. We were no longer the go-to's, the shoulder she cried on, the person she told all her secrets to, the audience for bouncing career ideas and life decisions off of. We were in the backseat and she had a new co-captain. We were selfish and singular in our thinking. Instead of being happy for her, which we were absolutely were, we were sad for ourselves because our lives were changing.

In my early thirties all my friends began having babies and I was just enjoying being a newlywed with the love of my life and in no rush to have babies, my husband is even less ready than I am. I find myself singing that same song "Another One Bites the Dust" as one by one my friends stop working out, drinking, and go to bed early. They stop committing to weekend getaways in the PNW and last minute meet ups because they have to pump, or the baby needs a nap, or worse yet they bring the baby along. When the baby comes, they are all cute and smell soft and sweet for a few minutes, then it becomes impossible to hold an adult conversation. Then I am all, excuse me, I need girl time, and to be able to finish a sentence and I don't want to entertain one kid while the other is sucking on your boob.

Then I got married. And I understood.